In The Wee Small Hours

by arianne

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{This photo is recent, but this post is from the archives.  Originally posted March of 2009, this post was when I had full time work and seemingly never-ending hours.  It was hard on us.  Hard on me.

This weekend I’ll be gone for a work trip, but come back on Sunday knowing that life has slowed to a sweet and velveteen pace in the ups and downs (deep downs) of the last year. I wrote this when I was weary.  Maybe you’ve been there?}

As I kissed each boy goodbye in the wee, still dark hours this morning, I couldn’t help but feel that familiar tug at my heart.  I didn’t want to go.  Didn’t want to leave them, yet again.

As much as we do as moms, the cleaning, the laundry, the wiping of tears, the calming spirit, the combing of hair, the encouragement to please bathe yourself for heaven’s sake, it’s all just a piece of a much larger puzzle.

Many of us also take meetings, go on business trips, spend hours on conference calls and aren’t recognized without a laptop on our laps or a phone on our ear.

This, I reminded myself as I slinked away and asked God to protect them and help them have less tears while I’m away, was why I was leaving.  I hoped maybe they could need the nurturing kind of mothering a little less while I’m off doing a totally different kind of mothering.  My identity as a mother has expanded so much in the last year, and being a mom (whether a work, stay or anything in between-at-home mom) has taken on new and complex meanings for me.

For this season of our lives, being the worker bee is part of my mom job description.  In some houses Dad is the new Mom, and in still others (like ours) everyone does a bit of everything.  This is Family 2.0.  No rules, just life.

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